The $7 Dopamine Hit (and Other Ways I Lie to Myself While Online Shopping)

Happy November!

Hi everyone, and welcome back to Not Quite Grown! I hope y’all had a fun Halloween weekend. I had two parties Friday and Saturday and I was exhausted come Sunday…but not tired enough to get my Christmas decor out!

I truly cannot believe Halloween is over and we’re now approaching Thanksgiving and Christmastime. It feels like yesterday that it was the dead of summer and I was begging for a reprieve from the hot, sticky weather. Well, we certainly got it. Temps have been way below average for this time of year, and I am loving the mild, almost wintry weather. Just not loving the sun setting at 4:30…seasonal depression, here we come!

I’m ready for the holidays and I’m also not, because they can get kind of crazy and stressful. I’m making it a goal of mine to enjoy them as much as possible by focusing on what I do have rather than what I don’t have. There are lots of social events and activities coming up, but rather than focusing on what I can’t control I’m going to focus on what I can control - enjoying said events and making the most out of them. Shout-out to therapy for this reframing and practicing mindfulness!

Let’s Talk About Mindless Spending

So if you’re like me, I consider myself to be a bit of a spender (that’s also a bit of an understatement). I’m very influenced by various ads on social media telling me to buy things I absolutely do not need. It doesn’t help that my algorithm shows me cute clothes or dumb-looking toys I could get for the cats, and I admit it’s partially my fault for engaging with that content, but I also blame our capitalistic society!! Darn you capitalism!! BUT, I can’t help but admit there’s a certain kind of confidence that hits when you walk into a retail store with your credit card and a little bit of free time.

You know you’re only there for toothpaste and laundry detergent (aka things you absolutely do need), and somehow, you walk out $86 later with a new candle, a throw pillow, and a notebook that says “Manifesting My Best Life.” The toothpaste and laundry detergent you were originally there for? Yeah, forgot that. Lately, I’ve been trying to be more mindful of how I spend money, or, let’s be honest, how I justify spending money. Because as fun as those random dopamine purchases feel in the moment, they hit a little differently when you’re staring down your credit-card bill at the end of the month thinking, “Wait, how did I spend $200 at HomeGoods?” (I can’t help it - HomeGoods is my weakness).

Financial Lessons I’m Learning

The sad, sad truth is, I don’t actually need another mug, or another sweater that’s almost the exact same style and color as the five I already have (and you don’t need it either - if you’re reading this in a store, put that back on the shelf!). What I do need is some financial peace of mind. I’m learning, quite painfully, that being responsible with money doesn’t mean never treating myself - it just means doing it more intentionally. For example, if I really want that coffee out, I’ll get it. But if I’m only buying it because I’m bored or stressed, maybe I need to pause and ask, “What am I actually trying to fix with this purchase?” I think it’s always a good idea to ask yourself that when you’re seeing the items in your cart on a website or a physical cart and you’re thinking, “What did I come here for originally again?” Getting into that habit of asking myself that before checking out of a store has made a difference in both what and how much I spend. I encourage you to ask yourself that too when you’re out shopping.

I also want to acknowledge how lucky I am to even have the flexibility to spend at all. I have a good credit score, my bills are paid, and I’m in a place where the challenge isn’t whether or not I can afford to put food on the table; it’s just learning discipline about my spending habits. That’s a huge privilege, and it’s something I don’t take lightly. So yeah! I’m trying my best to cut back on the “temporary happiness/dopamine boost” buys and focus more on long-term joy. Because no candle, mug, or throw blanket (as cute as they are) can compete with the peace of knowing my finances are under control.

I’m not perfect at it yet, but hey, awareness is half the battle, right?

Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to delete my cart before I get another “We saved your items!” Email reminder…..Whoops!

Grace’s Bit of Wisdom

Here’s some Grace wisdom that I’m imparting to you all: I’m always encouraging others to invest some money into new hobbies because those purchases actually are meaningful and intentional. Discovering how to embroider was not on my 2025 bingo card, but I’ve become hyper fixated on it and I can’t wait to try a new pattern completely on my own with minimal guidance! Wish me luck, because my last pattern was a #challenge and I got frustrated more than once. But, as I once saw on an Instagram reel, “Hobbies don’t demand perfection, they demand time and effort.” I don’t think that could be any more true. So, I encourage y’all to find a new hobby for the upcoming holiday season, or even pursue an old one that you haven’t picked up in years. I think homemade Christmas gifts are some of the best gifts I’ve ever received, and I’m sure your loved ones would appreciate a homemade gift from you! But even if the hobby is not something crafty, I think it’s a great way to kick the habit of getting on shopping apps. I think hobbies are way more fulfilling in the long run anyway.

See Y’all Real Soon!

Thank y’all for reading this week’s post! See y’all again next week. Remember to practice gratitude always, but especially during this season of thankfulness.

All my love,

Grace <3

My current phone wallpaper :)